Tuesday, November 8, 2016

David Rouben, you just made the list!

I love when websites answer questions that I type into Google.  I don't consider this a form of clickbait.  I consider it a service.  I wrote a blog post last year praising www.nj.com for answering my question about the Yankees.  Another great example is www.isabevigodadead.com.

Simple question.  Simple answer.

However, there's a dark side.  Sometimes you'll ask a question on google and click an article, only to discover the writer is a hack who refuses to provide a straightforward answer.

Last Wednesday, I googled: "Is South Park new tonight?"  I wound up clicking on a FanSided article titled "Is South Park new tonight, November 2nd?"  It was written by David Rouben, and his only job was to answer a yes-or-no question.  Instead, Rouben rambled on for six fucking paragraphs, and he actually wrote a recap of the season.  Seriously, this was the first paragraph:
If there’s any show that has proven to be a model of consistency, it’s South Park. A lot of shows don’t last half as long as South Park does, and when they do, their quality tends to drop well before then. But ever since South Park switched to a season-long arc model of storytelling, they have gone through something of a renaissance.
Just answer the question, you retard!

For the record,  the answer was "no."  It turns out you can visit www.cc.com/tv-schedule, and the table there will indicate whether an episode is new or not.  Rouben eventually provided that information in a roundabout manner at the end of the fourth paragraph.  I could give him credit for that, but I won't, because the information was buried and I still had to hunt around for it. This pissed me off so much that I've decided to start a list.  It will be a list of hack writers.  And David Rouben is the first name on that list:

List of hack writers:
David Rouben of Fansided.com, for his annoying and rambling clickbait.

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